OFFBEAT Ordering a trip back to 2009, with a side of nostalgia A time when Windows 7 was Microsoft's latest and greatest
offbeat Space Force goes to (pretend) orbital war following record-fast Rocket Lab launch Less than 17 hours after receiving orders, Rocket Lab put Pioneer in orbit for close-range maneuvers with True Anomaly's Jackal satellite
offbeat Digital indigestion: Fizzy Coca-Cola display chokes on full storage Ubuntu warning bubbles up on an Azores advertising screen
offbeat Ukraine puts its Russian war trophies online for allies to pick apart TrophyLab bad for Vlad as battlefield losses spill the secrets they had
offbeat Inspired by musical greeting cards, DARPA demands tiny, cheap, self-modifying systems One can't help but see a very clear instance of the triple constraint problem in action here
Offbeat Small island nation tries bold tech education strategy Is the UK's social media ban for kids just reverse psychiatry?
OFFBEAT EU won't force publishers to grant dead video games an afterlife Stop Killing Games campaign suffers setback as European Commission favors industry code of conduct over legal obligation
OFFBEAT Britain sending Ukraine an extra 30,000 drones – now 150,000 all up Missiles and radars also included in £752M aid package
OFFBEAT Waymo hits the brakes after robotaxis keep missing the signs for freeway construction zones Nearly 4,000 vehicles recalled for driving past closure warnings and between cones marking shut lanes
OFFBEAT Rockstar Games faces full hearing over alleged union busting Tribunal rejects bid to strike blacklisting claims, with proceedings due to conclude shortly before GTA VI launches
OFFBEAT Microsoft once used its own brand of 'Lego' to optimize Windows Making software feel snappier when you only have 12 MB RAM
offbeat DARPA seeks swappable satellites to help with future star wars Worried that an unexpected strike could take out critical orbital systems, Pentagon researchers want to know how fast the industry thinks it could launch replacements
offbeat The Y2K bug is back! Dutch dev digs up untimely flaw in old BSD build 26 years late and no threat unless you still run a PDP-11/70 and rely on short-wave timekeeping broadcasts
OFFBEAT Munch Museum Windows display gives visitors something to scream about When art reflects modern realities
offbeat Chinese e-tailer claimed 14-inch box stretched the size of a 9-inch tablet This is why you don’t let junior staff ‘save the company a few dollars’
OFFBEAT US Army picks out Vampire to fill a gap in its layered drone defenses L3Harris supplies system that can down incoming drones with laser-guided rockets
OFFBEAT World Cup AI predictor now lets users ask daft what-ifs Spoiler: It doesn't end well for Team Register
offbeat XP-era Windows spotted haunting London's driverless railway A blast from the past greets commuters
OFFBEAT Elon Musk is now worth more than $1,000,000,000,000 Retail investors lined up to get a handful of Musk's magic beans in SpaceX's debut
offbeat Hand-cranked AI box lets you get a workout while you wait for answers We're all familiar with AI cranks by now, but what about crank-powered AIs?
offbeat Blockbuster new Raspberry Pi project turns any screen into old-school VCR Who needs fancy menus and high definition? 240-MP will play your media files like it's 1999
offbeat Next stop, C:\ ... Paris Metro screen goes off the tracks Prochain arrêt: Gare du Bork! French capital city train does the tech can-can
offbeat NASA's Secret: Moon astronauts will be rocking Prada underwear What, you think any old liquid-cooled bodysuit would be acceptable to pair with such a fashionable outer layer?
offbeat Brit maritime agency heralds fresh global rules for crewless cargo ships If you thought driverless cars were bad, imagine a 200,000 ton container ship
Offbeat Tech support chap hauled out to help SWAT team saw his life flash before his eyes Bulletproof vests and armored vehicles were not in the job description
Offbeat Techie expensed a bag of oranges and then juiced up a stupid security incident He knew this was amazingly dumb but couldn’t stop laughing as the fruit went splat
Offbeat Rocket exhibit at National Space Centre pulls off unintentional NASA SLS impression 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... pfft
Offbeat FCC warns US broadcasters their licenses are a privilege, not a right TV and radio stations told to review current practices to align with public interest obligations
Offbeat Microsoft Excel champ proves he still has the formula Diarmuid Early dominates Amsterdam qualifier as competitive spreadsheeting sets sights on Vegas finals
Offbeat InPost locker caught shipping unactivated Windows Contactless collection meets Microsoft's licensing reminder
Offbeat Gothenburg's self-driving bus trammed on day one Autonomous shuttle's second passenger trip ends with rear-end collision and a tow truck
Offbeat Digital sovereignty, the musical: One engineer’s bizarre crusade against hyperscalers A French engineer has declared war on AWS, Google and Microsoft using AI-generated sea shanties, satirical poetry, and a multilingual protest campaign
Offbeat No captain, my captain: Navantia floats crewless warship Spanish shipbuilder's 75-meter drone vessel comes with sensors, modular payloads, and no room for sailors
AI + ML Deus ex machina: Half of US Christians trust AI's spiritual advice AI sycophancy + spirituality = uh oh
Offbeat UK Typhoon jets fitted with bargain-bin drone busters for Middle East sorties Low-cost laser-guided rockets offer cheaper way to swat Shahed-style threats than firing pricey air-to-air missiles
offbeat Yes, you can serve a website from a $1 microcontroller Well, page is more accurate, but the source code is available if you want to try doing something even crazier
Offbeat UK reloads artillery plans with £1B remote-control howitzer order 72 Boxer-mounted RCH 155s due from 2028 as Britain fills the gap left by AS-90s sent to Ukraine
Offbeat Grad-to-be turns graduation cap into Rust-powered light show Eric Park tells us he doesn't plan to wear his modified cap to commencement, but his code's available for anyone with no such qualms and an upcoming ceremony
Offbeat Dude… where’s my password? Claude reunites forgetful stoner with $400k Bitcoin stash AI to the rescue as 11-year search for password turns up in old PC files
Offbeat This browser add-in doesn't just hide ads, it tells you to OBEY Chromium extension swaps promos for John Carpenter-style subliminal slogans
Offbeat Man jailed for packing printer with something more expensive than toner: Cocaine Class A drugs loaded instead of A4
Offbeat US Army goes green-ish, wants soldiers munching on plant proteins Powders, gels, and fermented nutrients could someday join the battlefield menu
Offbeat Windows update prompt joins the Post Office queue Customers left staring at restart plea with no keyboard, mouse, or hope
Bork!Bork!Bork! The latest innovation in UK public transport: Schrödinger's trains Who knows what is going where. Might as well have a lovely beer instead.
Offbeat London’s BT Tower to get rooftop swimming pool Imagine taking a dip 177m above the streets of London’s West End
Offbeat Vi clone written in BASIC proves old habits :wq hard A few hundred lines of Yabasic recreate just enough to keep modal editing muscle memory alive
Offbeat Lego throws its own Hail Mary Movie-inspired set ticks the clever Technic box, but at a price
offbeat Bus station display takes the Windows 10 road to nowhere Spikes deter pigeons, but Microsoft still managed to foul the screen
Offbeat Young evil genius forces hamster to run on wheel to power his gadgets Okay, the rodent was a willing participant - after all, who turns down treats for a spin that charges a phone?
Offbeat IBM tried to kill Tab navigation. Microsoft told it Bill Gates' mother wasn't interested Big Blue escalated the OS/2 keyboard squabble through seven layers of management. Redmond's answer? Nope
OFFBEAT UK puts £20.5M behind 'numberplate for the skies' to keep tabs on drones Remote ID system will log aircraft identity and location as ministers try to stop rogue flyers grounding airports
Legal Viva la revolución: LinkedIn profile visitor lists belong to the people, says Noyb GDPR Article 15 doesn't care if you want to make money by selling users' data back to them
Offbeat DIY mystery box will wow your friends by hinting at what the ionosphere is up to A rough guide to when your signal will behave, or not
Science More missions, less money, higher risk: NASA's back to the '90s playbook Faster, better, cheaper is back and history suggests you can't get all three at the same time
Offbeat Unexpected item in Windows' bagging area Activating Windows will cost more than a couple of cheap carrier bags
Offbeat Hobbyist xenomorphs Raspberry Pi into Alien-themed DIY laptop Everything you need to build the PS-85 is available from its designer's website, even if you can't get to space
Legal Just in time for Labour Day, China makes it illegal to fire humans if AI takes their jobs PLUS: Samsung cashes in on RAM prices; Booze from space fetches huge price; China's hyperscalers surge
Science Artemis III aims for 'late 2027' for Earth orbit demonstration SpaceX and Blue Origin will absolutely be ready in time. Definitely
Science SpaceX rocket set for unintentional Moon landing – well, a piece of it anyway But unlike most junkers, it'll be traveling faster than the speed of sound, claims astronomy software dev
Offbeat Britain's £6B armoured sickener Ajax cleared for duty despite injuring troops Investigation finds no single cause for soldiers falling ill, just bad bolts, cold air, and apparently the soldiers themselves
Legal Databricks can't seem to shake authors' copyright claim that could result in 'extraordinary' damages Authors say it acquired an LLM that was trained on their copyrighted data, and judge keeps asking for more info
Science NASA boss: make Pluto a planet again Despite looming science cuts, Isaacman finds resources to poke the planetary hornet nest
Offbeat Bork in Prague: SUSE's keynote gods demand their tribute Linux vendor touts European independence while rate limits, Chromium popups, and cold sparks steal the show
Legal Cloudera had US candidates send resumes to a fake email address, DoJ charges PERM filings require employers to show American workers had a fair shot at the role
Science Trump admin pays wind developers to quit, back fossil fuel projects DoI offers up to $885M if they abandon offshore wind projects
Science Despite proposed science cuts, NASA boss says 'We haven't canceled anything yet' That 'yet' is sure doing a lot of heavy lifting if the budget for science is slashed
Legal Australia threatens tech companies with 2.25 percent tax if they don’t pay publishers Last time an idea like this came up, Meta packed up its toys and went home
Legal China blocks Zuck’s acquisition of AI outfit Manus Back to the drawing board for Meta's AI ambitions
Offbeat Friendster rises from the grave to make social media great again No ads, no algorithm, and you actually have to physically tap phones to add a friend
Science SpaceX dusts off Falcon Heavy for first flight in 18 months Side boosters to make simultaneous touchdown while center core takes one for the team
Offbeat In the beginning was the Bork: 'Heart of the Earth' exhibit reveals Raspberry Pi in existential crisis Dynamic Earth's ancient rock holds not primordial crystal, but a tiny Linux box having a bad day
BOFH BOFH: Arrr, I smell piracy ... and it's comin' from a machine with executive privileges Hang on, can't we just turn off the internet?
Science Solid-state batteries hold more juice, but keep cracking up. Now researchers know why Two teams, similar diagnosis: Ceramic electrolytes still refusing to cooperate
Science Nancy Grace Roman Space Telescope trumps Trump cuts, is launch-ready ahead of schedule Revolutionary telescope aiming for space after multiple near death experiences
Offbeat Google Meet or Google Mute? Even CEOs get borked sometimes Video conferencing has tripped us all up. Now cloud chief Thomas Kurian gets his turn
Science NASA reckons the Artemis II heat shield performed like a champ Good news for future missions as initial findings agree with agency's design decision
Science FAA grounds Blue Origin's New Glenn as it probes missed satellite delivery 'mishap' One of two second stage engines misbehaved, administration must sign off report before flights resume
Science NASA Inspector fears new spacesuits won’t be ready for Moon landing Dud contracts, proprietary designs, and zero-experience supplier make for quite the mess
Science You too can build a nuclear battery from junk you have lying around the house It won't provide much juice, but its creator calls it a 'nanowatt nuclear power plant'
Science Blue Origin nails the landing, but puts the payload satellite in the wrong orbit Wouldn't be the first time a Jeff Bezos company left a package in the wrong place
Bootnotes 'Invisible mouse' made a mess of PC rebuild You can't fix what you can't see – especially when your workspace is a maelstrom
Science NASA working on ‘Big Bang’ upgrade to keep the Voyagers alive for longer Tests scheduled for May can’t come soon enough after VGER 1 power glitch led to instrument shutdown
Science NASA gets the ball rolling on its part in Europe's jinxed Mars rover mission Rosalind Franklin moving again, though another budget cut looms
Offbeat Would you like fries with that terminal? Jack might be on Track, but the order screen certainly isn't
Legal Americans who masterminded Nork IT worker fraud sentenced to 200 months behind bars Fortune 500 companies and one US defense contractor got taken for $5m in four-year scam
Offbeat Obsolete Google nag drowns out vital bar information at Swedish concert hall Backup and Sync may be dead, but it still knows how to kill the buzz before the ukuleles start
Legal Indian government investigating TCS after police sting finds sexual harassment Services giant’s staff accused of assaults, inappropriate religious practices
Science Fission impossible: Uncle Sam wants nuclear reactors in space by 2031 Some on the Moon's surface, some in orbit. How does 5 years sound? Do-able, right nerds?
Science Britain's atomic brain trust gives itself till 2030 to unpick fusion challenges Armed with £2.5B, UKAEA sets out technical hurdles it wants cracked by end of decade
Offbeat Boeing deliveries soar past Airbus for the first time in years, but this is no time to unbuckle your seat belt